Dizzy

 I love mornings. I wake up with the baby, have coffee, write, check the porch to see what the cat dragged in. It’s lovely really. 

But today I woke up feeling dizzy. That happens to me. I don’t think I have a brain tumor. I think I have weird ears that like to mess with me. My dad has it too. I remember days when he would stumble and curse and tell mom how dizzy he felt and how miserable it was. So, I have dizzy days too now. And it’s disorienting and stressful. On dizzy days, I can see all my activity in a trail behind me. Open cabinets and drawers, food prep still layed out, it’s like a tornado has been through the house. I am so focused on whatever activity that I am doing, but my brain won’t let me do it quite right. I’m too focused on trying to balance and succeed at my objective, that little things like shutting cabinet doors are of less consequence. It’s wearing. It makes me exhausted physically and emotionally. And then it fades and I can breathe again. 


I guess sometimes my seas will just be rough. And I'll have to hold on a little tighter. 

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